This is my bed now

I'm going to warn you, I'm very random right now. But I should mention my livestream on Wednesday, January 26th at 7:30 pm ET right here: Lisa Jeanette Every Wednesday But One

My singer-songwriter friend, Brian Theoret, posts pics of his dog with the hashtag #thisismybednow because, Porter . . . at least I think that’s his name, likes to make his bed from whatever he decides at the moment might make a nice bed. 

That phrase “this is my bed now” came to mind this morning as I had a bad night health-wise, not knowing if I had a reaction to my meds (likely) from eating some of the wrong things (even more likely) or maybe I had COVID (less likely). Like most, I live in fear that the dreaded disease isn’t glomming onto me and I try to keep it at bay for as much and as long as possible. 

Still queasy, exhausted and sleep deprived, I took time off from work today to recover. Looking around me at all the things left undone, processing once again this constant feeling of being in some limbo state for an indefinite amount of time but knowing full well that this isn’t limbo. This is life. 

I love the imagery from Dandapani, Hindu priest and former monk, who says that the mind and awareness are two different things and that the mind doesn’t wander, awareness does. He imagines awareness as an orb of light that illuminates the part of your mind you send it to. 

My orb of awareness tends to want to disengage with whatever takes me the furthest at the time, whether it is binge-watching Succession on HBO, pretending I’m an interior designer playing Redecor on my phone or eating comfort food. This often keeps me from living my best life, i.e. writing songs.

I must interject that Wordle is probably one of the healthiest diversions as it is not an app, it only lets you play one game, and then it doesn’t let you play again for 12 hours or so. You cannot binge on it. It is a one and done 3 to 10 minutes of distraction available to you twice a day. Finito.

Speaking of distraction, I have spent quite a bit of time and resources of late to better understand focus, which is where Dandapani's course Unwavering Focus is helping. I am practicing focus every day - I really have to at this point. Quarantine life has exacerbated my ADHD/ADD, and it is a priority to understand it and battle the effects. The podcast "Hacking Your ADHD" is something I've been listening to a bit as well.

For now I’ve concluded, as my song Portrait says, that “this is the frame I belong to”. Or as Porter thinks, this is my bed now. It might not be my choice of bedding, but it’s what I’ve got available. 

We all have our struggles. I wonder if you have also found ways to cope over these past two years, and how you are dealing with it. Let me know in the comments and share any tips you have found. 

In the meantime, please enjoy my hippie nutcracker - yes, it's still Christmas at Casa DeAngelis!

 

#hippie #hippienutcracker #wordle #ADD #ADHD #Dandapani #Focus #Succession #Covid #BrianTheoret #Portrait #Songwriter #SingerSongwriter

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